Elf Warming!

By Jojo

Twas the night before Christmas when all through the house, not a creature was stirring not even a……….Ahhhhh Elf!

Previously that day….

Santa strode down the rows of beds in the infirmary with a worried look on her face. Her brown wavy hair escaping out in wild tendrils from underneath her crimson hat and black boots tapping purposefully as she stopped and scrutinised every occupant in the beds.

The occupants of the aforementioned beds looked up sorrowfully as she passed by. Small hands clutched the brightly coloured blankets and underneath night caps, pointy ears protruded. These were Santa’s Elves and at this present time, all of them, or not quite all, were tucked up in bed with big red spots adorning their faces.

If it had been any other time of year, Santa wouldn’t have been so worried. However, today was Christmas Eve, their most busiest day of the year and it seemed that her elves had come down with a sudden attack of the measles!

Santa let out a long sigh and tut tutted, it was going to be a very long Christmas Eve indeed.

“I’m sorry Santa, but I really can’t allow you to take any of these elves out tonight” announced Bossy Boots the Chief Elf as she took the temperature of a nearby patient.

“What on earth has happened? All my elves struck down by…” She was interrupted by Bossy Boots.

“It’s the red splodge. Nasty. They need plenty of bed rest and absolutely no going out in the cold night air.”

“But Bossy Boots, surely not all my elves have the red splodge? And what exactly is the red splodge?”

Bossy Boots jumped down from the high hospital bed and bustled over to the next woebegone little Elf, calling over her shoulder

“Elves are allergic to broccoli Santa, it brings them out in the red splodge should they eat it and if I’m very much mistaken, your Elves have ingested It! There is mischief afoot here!”

At those words, a small scuffling could be heard outside the swing door of the infirmary, followed by muffled squeaks. Santa raised an eyebrow and pointing towards the doors mouthed “What is going on?”

Bossy Boots tossed her head and rolled her green eyes “Pipsqueak and Stripey Long Legs!”

Santa ran her hand over her brow, Pipsqueak and Stripey Long Legs! Of all her elves, these were the two most mischievous. They had only just scraped through Elf School and that had been a miracle in itself. Santa had spent many a sleepless night, pondering on whether she should let them graduate, especially when their grades had been so poor. Pipsqueak had only managed a D in Toy making and Stripey Long Legs had just scraped a pass in Present wrapping. But for all their poor grades, Santa actually had a soft spot for the naughty pair.

“There’s nothing for it Santa, you will have to take Pipsqueak and Stripey Long Legs with you tonight” Bossy Boots words broke through Santa’s thoughts.

Sighing deeply Santa nodded, there was nothing else she could do about it. She needed help, otherwise all the children would be disappointed to wake on Christmas Day and find no gifts in their Christmas stockings.

“Those two had to resit their Santa’s Little Helper Exam if I remember correctly!” She exclaimed aloud as she crossed the infirmary floor in long strides. “And if they cause me any mischief tonight Bossy Boots, then you’ll find yourself not only dealing with the red splodge but also a case of the crimson seat!” and with that she was gone, leaving the doors swinging wildly on their hinges.

Five minutes later the sound of clattering hooves on the cobbled stable yard could be heard alongside the tinkle of sleigh bells. Bossy Boots climbed a stool and stood looking out of the window.  Rudolph and his gang were preparing for the night ahead, but where oh where were Pipsqueak and Stripey Long Legs?


Green elvish eyes peered over the wall to the stable yard, watching Santa prepare the sleigh. If Santa knew she was being watched she didn’t show it, but continued placing the harness on each reindeer and linking the team together.

“I wonder if she knows?” hissed Pipsqueak as she ducked back out of sight, for Santa had turned suddenly and was now facing their hiding spot.

“Well it was your idea in the first place” whispered Stripey Long Legs and she poked her smaller comrade in mischief.

“Hey stoppit!” Pipsqueak tumbled over, caught by surprise. “You helped if I remember rightly, you’re the one who made the soup!’ and she reached out her arm and deftly pulled on Stripey Long Legs’ leather jerkin pulling the taller elf over.

“Ssssh Pipsqueak, Santa might hear!” Stripey Long Legs squealed as she toppled down onto her chum.

Together, the two elves rolled around, each trying to gain the upper hand. They were soon out of breath and laughter had taken over for at the end of the day they were the best of friends.

There had been a reason as to why Pipsqueak and Stripey Long Legs had decided to jinks their fellow elves. It had all come about two weeks ago, when Bossy Boots had announced the tasks that each elf would perform on Christmas Eve. Reading from a long list, Bossy Boots had called out each elf’s name and the job they had been assigned.

“As you know elves, good Elf School grades will be awarded with responsible Santa jobs.”

At this pronouncement Pipsqueak and Stripey Long Legs had looked at each other, bottom lips pouting. It was highly unlikely that they would be given the highly coveted job of riding in Santa’s sleigh on Christmas Eve.

“Bet Goody Two Shoes gets that job” muttered Stripey Long Legs underneath her breath. Pipsqueak nodded in agreement and two minutes later their prediction had come true. Goody Two shoes had almost exploded with the sheer importance of being Santa’s Little Helper.

Soon Bossy Boots had finished reading the list and Pipsqueak and Stripey Long Legs had found out that they would be given the job of preparing the reindeer food.

“Deep joy!” sighed Pipsqueak and she pulled her hat further down her head, covering her eyes. Her curly black hair escaping out from underneath the green felt, giving an impression of a rather spidery looking party hat!

It wasn’t that the elves disliked the reindeer, for who could dislike Rudolph, Blixen, Comet, Donner, Dasher, Prancer, Vixen, Cupid, and Dancer? It was just that they wanted to help Santa out on the big night. It would be such fun, flying silently through the frosty night air, landing on roofs, sliding down chimneys and delivering parcels. So that was why, when they were both in the kitchen, scraping and chopping up carrots that the plan to put their fellow elves out of action was hatched, and it had worked like a dream!


Santa however, was well aware that the two mischievous elves had been watching her. What Pipsqueak and Stripey Long Legs hadn’t realised was that Santa also had magical listening ears and had heard the entire hushed conversation.

“Those two elves are the most troublesome elves to ever graduate!” Santa observed to herself as she ran a strong hand over soft reindeer fur, checking the harness was neither too tight or too loose. But now was not the time to deal with naughtiness, that would have to wait. There was work to be done and Pipsqueak and Stripey Long Legs were needed.

“Pipsqueak! Stripey Long Legs go get Rudolph for me please!” Santa had a beautiful modulated voice and it rang out across the stable yard, stopping the two elves in their play.

Out of the corner of her eye, Santa could see two heads pop up like Jack in the boxes, one with unruly black curls, that was Pipsqueak, the other with burnished copper locks standing up on end, that was Stripey Long Legs. Santa shook her head in admonition as the pair scampered across the cobbled yard towards the stables for both had lost their caps and she could see straw sticking out of tunics!


Rudolph! The very name of Santa’s lead rider was enough to put Pipsqueak and Stripey Long Legs in a tizzy. They had never in their wildest dreams thought they would be given the honour of escorting him from his stall to be harnessed to the sleigh! Santa only allowed her top elves to handle Rudolph.

“Santa must think we’re really responsible.” Stripey Long Legs puffed out her chest in pride as she entered Rudolph’s stall.

“Santa must think we’re super responsible” reiterated Pipsqueak as she followed after Stripey Long Legs.

That warm fusty smell of animal, straw and dung hung over Rudolph’s stall. The reindeer was standing placidly, nose in the manger chomping on carrots and broccoli. He was beautiful looking, thick grey brown fur, antlers covered in soft down and his nose……Rudolph didn’t have a red nose as the song proclaimed him to have, his nose was a rich chocolate brown.

Stripey Long Legs lifted the halter down from its peg and with a little bit of help from Pipsqueak they managed to slide it over Rudolph’s head.

“Come on Rudolph, we need to get you harnessed to the sleigh” and Stripey Long Legs clipped the lead rope onto the halter and pulled.

Rudolph however, refused to budge!

Come on Rudolph, Santa is waiting!” and Pipsqueak pushed him from behind. Rudolph however still refused to budge!

Together both elves heaved on the rope, their boots sliding out from underneath them as they tried to keep their balance on the shiny cobbles.

COME ON RUDOLPH!” they both panted, faces bright red with exertion, but still he remained stationary.

“I know!” Pipsqueak had an idea. Stripey Long Legs nodded as Pipsqueak whispered her plan, it was quite simple really. Holding tightly onto the rope both scamps bent down and then on the count of three yelled “BOO!” at the tops of their voices in Rudolph’s ear.

Poor Rudolph almost jumped out of his fur! However, he kept his fur on, racing out of the stable block, hooves slithering and skittering in all directions and a shocked look on his reindeer face. Pipsqueak and Stripey Long Legs held on to the rope not daring to let go. Legs and arms flapped widely as they trailed behind the frightened reindeer accompanied by ouches, yelps and ows as they bumped across the hard cobblestones. They couldn’t hold on for long though, both let go and came to a sliding halt, right in front of Santa!


Santa folded her arms and tapped her foot with exasperation as she watched the antics of her two elves! She was not amused to see poor Rudolph running as though his tail had caught fire!

“Stay exactly where you are” she commanded and then turning towards Rudolph, she began a series of low whistles as she walked towards him. Rudolph perked his ears, the low whistle beginning to soothe him and he started trotting towards Santa.

Santa caught up his lead rope and guided him gently back to the team of reindeer already hitched to the sleigh.

“There there boy” She muttered softly to him as she fastened the straps securely to the sleigh. Once done, she gave him one last pat and strode over to an upturned water barrel and sat down.

“Pipsqueak and Stripey Long Legs come here please” and she began to roll up her sleeve.

Pipsqueak and Stripey Long Legs hadn’t moved since Santa had told them to stay put, but on hearing her call their names, they scurried over and stood before Santa, heads hanging, hands behind their backs.

“That was a very silly thing to do to Rudolph” scolded Santa as she continued to roll up her sleeve.

“We’re sorry Santa! We were only trying to make him move!” Pipsqueak looked uncertainly at Stripey Long Legs, why was Santa rolling up her sleeve?

They soon found out for Santa took hold of Stripey Long Legs hand and with practised ease tipped the elf over her knee. Flipping up her tunic, Santa applied five sharp crisp spanks to Stripey Long Legs’ bottom. Stripey Long Legs let out a yowl as Santa’s hand connected smartly with her legging clad behind. But as soon as it had started, it was over and the elf found herself back up on her feet rubbing a smarting rear.

“Your turn” and Santa did exactly the same to Pipsqueak, holding the elf tightly against her as her hand reigned down the same five sharp crisp spanks on her upturned bottom. Pipsqueak true to her name, let out a series of squeaks and squeals as Santa’s hand snapped across her rear and then she too was stood back up.

Santa eyed the naughty pair and wagged a finger “That Pipsqueak and Stripey Long Legs was a reminder on how to behave. The two of you will be having a proper conversation with me later tonight when our work is done. Broccoli soup indeed!” and rolling down her sleeve, she stood and walked back to the waiting sleigh. A small smile crossed her lips as she remembered their shrieks and yelps! That had been a mere taster! The main course was yet to come!


The rest of the afternoon, the two elves were kept busy by loading the sleigh with all sorts of goodies, parcels and gifts. Excitement was in the air, they could almost taste it! Then at long last Santa told them to go and change and meet her back at the sleigh in ten minutes!

Pipsqueak and Stripey Long Legs hopped and skipped their way towards the elf dormitory, this was their big moment and although Santa had promised a sound spanking later tonight, it was not enough to dull their enthusiasm.

The elf dormitory was deserted, for as you know, the sickly elves were all tucked up in bed in the infirmary, feeling very sorry themselves. Laid out on their beds were clean laundered clothes. The two little elves scrambled into their uniforms and then stood before the mirror admiring themselves. Stripey Long Legs wore a velvet tunic of moss green set off by green and black striped leggings whilst her smaller partner looked equally smart dressed in a tunic of dusty red velvet accompanied by red and black stripey leggings. But it was the boots and the cap which really caught their attention! For at the end of each boot and each cap was a gold tinkling jingling bell!

“Look Stripey Long Legs!” and Pipsqueak shook her head making the bell ring out with a soft jangle.

“We’re definitely Santa’s Little Helpers “Stripey Long Legs danced a jig, the bells on her feet ringing out clear and bright.

Just then the door opened and Bossy Boots entered. Both elves stopped their capers and watched as she approached.

“Hmmm, you two have surpassed yourselves this time, but I shall leave that to Santa to deal with” and a frown crossed her wrinkled face.

Stripey Long Legs and Pipsqueak hung their heads with shame but just as they were thinking Bossy Boots was cross with them she asked them to kneel.

Side by side the two elves knelt down on the hard tiled floor to receive the elf blessing of Christmas Eve. The words were simple but sometimes simplicity is all that is required.

“God speed and safe journey” and Bossy Boots placed her hand on their heads. The elves didn’t realise, but as she did, a small spark, a frisson of elf magic surrounded them. It would keep them safe and out of harms way for the journey.

Together the three elves walked back to the stable yard and the awaiting sleigh. Stripey Long Legs and Pipsqueak stopped in their tracks at the sight before them. The sleigh was glistening and shimmering in the evening dusk. Somehow, it looked much larger, much more spectacular than before. Rudolph and his team stood in regal state, the gold and red brocade of their harness adorned with bells.

The reindeer were ready. The anticipation was electric as they pawed the cobbles waiting for the off and as they breathed out, the frosty air turned their breath to ice crystals which sparkled for a moment before fading away.

But it was Santa, Santa herself which took the elves own breath away. There she stood resplendent, dressed in crimson, hat and tunic edged with white fur. Black leather belt, encircled her waist and black boots encasing shapely legs.

Santa motioned for Pipsqueak and Stripey Long Legs to join her in the sleigh. Both jumped in, one on either side. Standing, Santa set the sleigh team running with a single CRACK of her whip and as the sleigh hurtled towards the closed gates of the stable yard, Pipsqueak and Stripey Long Legs cried out, fearing they would career into the very gates themselves! But just as they thought they would be smashed to smithereens, the gates opened wide and the sleigh sped through, losing contact with the ground as it rose into the night sky. Santa let out a wild cry as they soared towards the stars. An aura had descended upon her, blue eyes flashing with the excitement of the evening before them and wavy brown hair flowing out behind her! The sleigh looked magnificent but Santa was magnificent. For this was Santa’s night!


“Ssssh Stripey Long Legs!” and Pipsqueak stuck her head down the chimney, calling down to her friend. The pair of them were having the most tremendous fun and at the present moment in time, the sleigh was perched precariously on top of the roof tiles of a town house.

Santa was already inside and had given strict instructions that they were to bring the second sack of parcels “and please make sure you’re quiet” she had reminded them, for at the previous house, they had made so much noise they had almost been discovered. If it hadn’t been for the quick-thinking Santa, Stripey Long Legs and Pipsqueak would have been seen!

Pipsqueak picked up the sack which was packed full of gifts and hefted it over her shoulder. However, she underestimated its weight and toppled over backwards, right down the chimney! Stripey Long Legs who was now inside the house, peered back up the chimney. She could hear muffled ouches and ooffs as Pipsqueak slid down.

“Ssssh Pipsqueak!” said Stripey Long Legs as Pipsqueak finally emerged although slightly out of breath from her ordeal.

“Hey look mince pies!” Pipsqueak dusted herself down and then pointed to a plate of the tasty treats laying by the side of the fire fender!

“And what’s this?” Stripey Long Legs picked up a small glass which held a dark brown looking liquid. She smelt it, oh it smelt so good! She raised the glass to her lips and tasted it, oh it tasted so delicious! “Try this Pipsqueak, it’s yummy” and picking up a second glass she passed it to her chum.

Pipsqueak took a tiny sip. Gosh this was scrumptious. Pipsqueak slurped the rest of her drink and set it back down on the tray, a little hiccup escaping her. Stripey Long Legs let out a small giggle and then she too went hic!


Santa tiptoed downstairs, she had just laid out parcels on the end of sleeping children’s beds and now she was about to place some gifts around the tree. She really needed her elves to hurry up, there was still lots to do as the night had not ended yet.

As she crept into the lounge, she saw the two scamps sitting down and eating mince pies. Santa smiled to herself, they were obviously hungry but then she stopped. Was that a giggle she had heard and was that a hiccup?

“Pipsqueak! Stripey Long Legs!” Santa tried to keep her voice low. Both elves turned around and looked up at her.

“Are you two drinking?”

Both elves nodded, their caps jingling in unison.

“Yes Santa, and look here’s a glass for you. It’s really tasty” and Pipsqueak held out a third glass.

Santa had to hide a smile, for they obviously did not realise that the sweet sticky concoction was alcoholic.

“This is sherry!” and taking the glass, she set it down on a nearby table.

Pipsqueak and Stripey Long Legs’ mouths opened in horror for they had just broken one of the rules of being Santa’s Little Helper and then they both chuckled, for the sherry was taking effect!

“Bbbbb….but we didn’t realise.” Stripey Long Legs made an attempt of puppy dog eyes, but her green eyes sparkled merrily which spoilt the effect!

Santa sighed, these two really would be the death of her!

“Mince pies, you can eat, milk you can drink, but you are not to touch or drink anything else without checking with me.”

Again, the pair nodded, big green eyes looking as solemnly as was possible, which was rather tricky for they were rather tipsy.

Santa knelt down on one knee and pulled the tray which was still laden with tasty morsels towards her, fortunately there were two glasses of creamy milk which had been left untouched by the elves.  Pulling out a small paper packet and a silver spoon, she scooped out three spoonfuls of red powder into each glass and stirred.

“Pipsqueak, drink this please” and she held out the frothing liquid to the elf. Pipsqueak turned up her nose as she accepted the drink, for milk was not her favourite. But seeing the look on Santa’s face she decided that perhaps it wouldn’t be in her best interests to protest.

“Stripey Long Legs, here’s yours” and the second glass of milk was handed over.

Santa watched in amusement as they held their noses and gulped back the fizzing milk. Thank goodness Bossy Boots had the foresight to prepare a magic potion. “It’s an anti-tipsy remedy Santa, take it, for you may need it for Pipsqueak and Stripey Long Legs” Bossy Boots had said as she had handed over the package.

The milk, had an immediate effect on the elves and the hiccups and the tipsiness evaporated as soon as it had begun.

“But Santa” Pipsqueak asked when they were back in the sleigh “won’t the children be upset if we don’t eat all the mince pies and drink all the sherry?”

“Yes Santa, for after all they have put out the goodies for us to eat and drink wont they be disappointed?” Stripey Long Legs nodded her head vigorously, for she rather liked the noise of her tinkling cap.

“Obviously, you can’t eat and drink everything, otherwise you’d go pop.” Pipsqueak was thoughtful. If they ate and drank at every household they would have very fat tummies indeed! She stole a look at Santa, how did she keep her trim figure?

“I bet the parents have something to do with it, but what?”  Stripey Long Legs wasn’t too sure

Santa grinned “That, my elves is a secret” and with a crack of her whip the sleigh rose into the sky.


“Hut, hut, hut! “Santa was moving the sleigh team at a tremendous pace, for the sun was just cresting over the horizon. Strands of pink reaching out and turning the sky from dark into light.  Their job was done, they needed to get back home, for it was Christmas Day.

Santa sat back in the sleigh and cast a look on either side of her. Stripey Long Legs and Pipsqueak were trying to hold back their giggles! Santa shook her head in disbelief. The pair of them were incorrigible, but saying that, they had worked very hard tonight.

“It’s not funny” she admonished them for she didn’t want them to think she approved of their tricks and antics. Secretly, however, she had rather enjoyed herself.

The elves high jinks hadn’t stopped since the incident with the sherry. Santa thought back on some of the escapades that they had got up to. The cheeky pair had switched the angel on the Christmas Tree for a smoked cheese and if it hadn’t been for Santa’s acute sense of smell, it would still have been there!

Then, there was the escaped hamster! Santa almost groaned out loud when she thought about poor Humphrey!  That had been a close call indeed. Pipsqueak and Stripey Long Legs had never seen a hamster before and when they came across Humphrey curled up in his cage, they had instantly fallen in love with him. Santa had to admit that Humphrey did indeed look very cute with long black fur, bright beady eyes and a pink nose. However, looks were deceiving, for Humphrey was not cute!

Pipsqueak had opened the cage and with the help of Stripey Long Legs picked him up! Humphrey had not liked this and took an instant dislike to both elves. His long teeth had sunk themselves into Pipsqueak’s finger! Poor Pipsqueak was shocked and waggled her arm in an attempt to get Humphrey to release her finger. This he had done, but to their horror he had then scuttled off out of the sleeping children’s bedroom as fast as his hamster paws could take him.

Pipsqueak and Stripey Long Legs had run as softly as they could after Humphrey, which was rather difficult as they had bells on their feet and caps. Santa on hearing the kerfuffle had come swiftly down the chimney, grabbed both elves by their collars as they scooted by and lifted them off the floor.

“Will you two be quiet!” she had hissed and then given each elf a small shake. That had been a mistake as the shake set their bells off again! Pipsqueak and Stripey Long Legs had giggled, for now it was Santa making all the noise!

Then, poor Santa had felt something crawling up her back! The something appeared to have claws and was scuttling up her tunic as fast as could be. Santa froze, dropped both elves and then started to dance, flapping her arms about in an attempt to get rid of the ‘something’. This caused Pipsqueak and Stripey Long Legs to dissolve further into laughter and they rolled around the floor holding their stomachs and gasping for breath.

Finally, the ‘something’ was revealed. Humphrey emerged from behind Santa and sat on her shoulder nibbling her ear. Santa looked rather like a pirate but with a hamster instead of a parrot! Lifting the hamster off, Santa had held him gently in the crook of her arm and looked down at her naughty elves.

“Pipsqueak! Stripey Long Legs back to the sleigh now!”

Both elves, stopped their chuckles and picking themselves off from the floor, they brushed themselves down. Santa set them scampering back to the fireplace with a sharp tap to their behinds. As she watched them disappear back up the chimney, she felt that familiar tingle in her palm.


Sitting in the sleigh, Pipsqueak and Stripey Long Legs tried their best not to giggle, especially as Santa looked so stern! However, they were elves after all and elves were mischievous for it was in their nature. Both were thinking of the very last stop.

The sleigh had crossed continents and had flown over America with Santa and her elves delivering parcels as they went.  Rudolph and his team had brought the sleigh to a halt on the clinkered rooftop of a homestead. All was in darkness, as it should be because this was Christmas Eve after all. Santa hoisted a sack onto her back and with the help of Pipsqueak and Stripey Long Legs, they slid down the chimney and straight into the living room.

“I shall deliver the parcels to the children, you two are to place the rest around the tree” instructed Santa as she padded towards the sleeping quarters. The elves nodded and began to do as instructed. However, they soon got distracted for just at that moment they heard a noise coming from the backyard.

Tiptoeing stealthily so not to make a noise, the two elves peeped out of the backdoor. What was that sound?

Then Stripey Long Legs laughed “Look Pipsqueak, it’s only a silly old hen” and she pointed to a chicken perched on a hencoop. Pipsqueak sighed with relief!  For both of them had wondered at the noise.

“Come on Stripey Long Legs, let’s get back to work, otherwise Santa will be cross.”

Together they walked back into the house, but being elves, they forgot to latch the back door! Soon they were happily arranging gifts around the Christmas Tree, but they failed to notice the backdoor being pushed open and a pink snout appear followed by flappy ears and trotters!  The pink intruder trotted into the kitchen and snuffled around. It found the kitchen bench and standing on hind legs it helped itself to the tasty treats laid out!  Feeling rather hungry still, the porcine guest then decided to investigate further and hearing the sound of tinkling bells and hushed laughter, it ambled its way into the living room.


Pipsqueak and Stripey Long Legs froze on the spot! Then, as one they spun round on their heels and stared at ….

Pig!” they yelled in unison and promptly scuttled up the Christmas Tree, diving headfirst between the branches with only their bottoms sticking out and that was how Santa found them!


When Santa walked back into the living room. She couldn’t believe her eyes or her ears! The poor Christmas Tree was shaking and trembling, it appeared that her elves had decided to decorate the tree by using themselves! She was not amused, and then she cast a glance into the kitchen. Oh my word, who had left all that mess? Santa looked back up the tree, hmmm Stripey Long Legs and Pipsqueak better have a good explanation.

Santa then heard a rather loud grunt! Goodness me what was that? Spinning round she gazed in the direction of the grunt. There lying splayed out before the fireplace, her trotters twitching as she slept, lay Gertrude the Pig! Gertrude smirked a piggy smirk as she snored happily away. She was quite warm and cosy, with a tummy full of tasty food. She was a very happy pig indeed!

Santa had to smile at the sight, for never had a pig looked so content! Then casting a look back up the tree she had to grin, for Stripey Long Legs and Pipsqueak still had not moved! Never had two elves caused so much bother!

“Come on out you two” she called up at Pipsqueak and Stripey Long Legs.

“Has it gone Santa?” Pipsqueak poked her head through the branches looking worried.

“Out now!” Santa wasn’t going to put up with any more Elvish nonsense. She watched as the two clambered down from the tree. The tree was looking very sorry for itself, with bits of tinsel hanging off, broken baubles and the Star looked so skewwhiff that even the Three Wise men from Afar, would have had difficulty in finding baby Jesus!

“What am I going to do with you two?” Santa folded her arms and looked sternly down at the pair. It was a rhetorical question, for Santa knew exactly what she was going to do and before the evening was out two elves were going to get their bare bottoms soundly spanked!

“We’re sorry Santa but really it wasn’t our fault. That pig is the naughty one!” Pipsqueak pointed at Gertrude.

Santa however, shook her head “Who let her in?”

Pipsqueak and Stripey Long Legs looked at each other. “She did” said Pipsqueak and pointed at Stripey Long Legs at the same time Stripey Long Legs said “She did” and she pointed at Pipsqueak!

Santa settled the disagreement “In that case I shall punish you both, now Stripey Long Legs make good in the kitchen please, Pipsqueak you are to re-decorate the Christmas Tree and I shall sort out the pig!”

The troublesome two did as Santa bid and in no time at all, the kitchen was shipshape. The Christmas Tree’s tinsel and baubles were replaced and the Star once more stood upright at the top. Pipsqueak gave it a little dusting of elf magic so that it shone and sparkled in the darkened room, a reminder for all that a star so very long ago had shone this very night above a stable shed.

Gertrude had been persuaded to return to her sty and was merrily rooting around in the straw, chomping on the delicious red apples that Santa had gifted. This was a Christmas to remember she thought as she crunched away.


The sleigh was now approaching home and Santa began to slow the team. Lights were shining out from the stable block, a welcoming sight after such a long busy night. The gates opened wide as the sleigh began its descent and soon it had touched down on the cobbles.

Bossy Boots, was there to greet them. A lantern in one hand and a tray of hot berry juice in the other.

“Come, come” she chided as Santa, Pipsqueak and Stripey Long Legs tumbled out of the sleigh and accepted the steaming mugs. All three were tired but the drinks revived them. Santa was the first to finish, settling her empty mug back on the tray she tapped each elf on their nose.

“Pipsqueak and Stripey Long Legs, you worked hard tonight” the two elves grinned broadly, for this was praise indeed from Santa. “However,” Santa paused, her gaze resting on first one face and then the other. If ever, two faces showed guilty looks, then they were the faces of Pipsqueak and Stripey Long Legs.

“I believe, that we need to deal with your naughtiness” and with that she reached over to the tray that Bossy Boots was still holding and plucked up a bright green feather quill.

Pipsqueak and Stripey Long Legs knew immediately what the quill meant. Santa handed the quill to Stripey Long Legs. “You know what to do, my apartment now please, once done you are to find a corner on either side of my fireplace. I shall rest up the team and then I will be with you.”

Stripey Long Legs and Pipsqueak walked sadly across the cobbled yard. It had always been spoken about, but they had never seen it. They had always believed it to be a rumour so that children behaved. Now they knew! Santa expected them to write their names on her naughty List!

Pipsqueak pushed opened the door to Santa’s apartment. It was warm and cosy, a fire roaring in the fireplace, heating the room. Furs scattered on the wooden floors and large comfy looking armchairs dotted around. The room had large windows which reflected the flames from the fire. It was a room to relax in.

The naughty List lay on the large oak table, a pot of red ink beside. First one elf then the other dipped the quill into the ink and scratched their names upon the paper. Then silently they took up their places in the corner, either side of the fireplace, standing to attention as though they were soldiers on parade.


Santa closed the door to Rudolph’s stable. The reindeer was once more standing placidly, nose in his manger, munching carrots and broccoli. He and his team had worked hard tonight delivering gifts all over the world and ensuring their handler and her elves arrived home safely. If ever reindeer deserved rest and repast, it was Rudolph, Prancer, Dancer, Comet, Cupid, Donner, Vixen, Dasher and Blixen.

Crossing the stable yard, Santa walked with purpose, her boots click clacking across the stones. She paused just before she entered her apartment. Looking up at the sky she could see the stars were dimming as day took over. White snowflakes were beginning to fall, silently one by one, floating down to settle onto the cold ground. She stood and watched mother nature herald in Christmas Day. Santa’s job was done.

Pushing open the door to her apartment, Santa stepped inside. Pipsqueak and Stripey Long Legs were either side of the fireplace, standing to attention. She didn’t say anything, but made her way into her chamber. Red tunic and trousers were exchanged for a tight fitting red t-shirt and dark skinny jeans. Boots came off and sneakers came on.

Santa went across to her chest of drawers, pulling out the middle one, she extracted a small wooden paddle. It was oval in shape, slightly bigger than an old-fashioned hairbrush. It was made from the wood of the silver birch, light weight but like the silver birch it was springy and could deliver a sting to any deserving bottom, and Santa had two deserving behinds to deal with!

Santa walked back into the living room and towards the table. Placing the paddle on the table, she pulled out a wooden chair and sat down. It was time.


 Pipsqueak and Stripey Long Legs heard Santa call them over. Both elves turned and with reluctance made their way to stand in front of her. Pipsqueak shuffled from foot to foot, whereas Stripey Long Legs traced a pattern on the floor with the toe of her boot. All was quiet in the room.

“Did you two give broccoli soup to your fellow elves?” Santa’s stern voice broke through the silence.

Two heads nodded in unison. The bells on their caps jingling as they admitted their mischief.

“We just wanted to help deliver the parcels with you.” Pipsqueak’s green eyes met Santa’s blue.

“I see.” Santa nodded her head before adding “That was a naughty thing to do.”

Pipsqueak dropped her eyes and looked down at her feet.

“Who, swapped the angel for a smoked cheese?”

Stripey Long Legs raised her hand.

“I see” and Santa nodded again before saying “and the hamster?”

This time it was Pipsqueak who raised her hand.

“I see, and the pig?”

Both elves raised their hands this time.

Santa nodded “Well Pipsqueak and Stripey Long Legs, you have earnt yourselves a spanking” and she clapped her hands together making the two rascals jump.

Pipsqueak and Stripey Long Legs turned a shade of pink when they heard Santa pronounce the consequence.  To be spanked by Santa and on Christmas Day at that! Santa motioned for Stripey Long Legs to sit on a hard wooden stool, for it was Pipsqueak who was going to be first.


Pipsqueak soon found herself across Santa’s knee. The smaller elf’s fingertips barely touched the floor, whereas her feet couldn’t touch it at all!  Santa wrapped a firm arm around her waist and Pipsqueak realised that there would be no going anywhere for she was held so fast! Santa flipped up Pipsqueak’s tunic and rested her palm on the seat of her striped leggings.

“Elves who misbehave will always find themselves across my knee.”

“Yes Santa.” Pipsqueak’s voice was a little sullen! Santa raised an eyebrow. Hmmm, this elf was still being cheeky! Without more ado, Santa hooked her finger in the back of Pipsqueak’s leggings and tugged them down to her knees. Pipsqueak let out a cry of protest, which got louder still, for Santa did not stop at just her leggings! Poor Pipsqueak, felt Santa grasp the waistband of her panties, pulling them down over her hips and settling them around her knees. Pipsqueak was now bare bottomed across Santa’s knee and she didn’t like it!

Santa raised her hand and begun the spanking. Her palm smacked one white cheek, leaving a pink splotch and then she did the same to the other white cheek! Pipsqueak now had two matching pink splotches on her bottom! The elf cried out in dismay, for Santa continued to warm up her rear by spanking alternate cheeks, going from one to the other in a steady rhythm. Santa wasn’t spanking too hard; her intention was to give the elf a thorough warming before spanking a little firmer!

Pipsqueak however, had never in all her Elvish life been spanked. The occasional swat to her behind was all she had received. This was a new experience for her, and one she would not forget in a hurry! The room was filled with Pipsqueak’s yelps and the sound of Santa’s palm smacking a naughty elf’s bottom.

Poor Stripey Long Legs looked with worry at the scene before her. She knew that shortly they would be exchanging places and that her backside soon would be the bright rosy colour that Pipsqueak’s was!

Pipsqueak suddenly found her bottom raised higher in the air, as Santa raised one knee and dropped the other. Santa had changed both rhythm and tempo for suddenly Pipsqueak couldn’t guess where Santa’s palm was going to land. Then with a deft under swing, Santa aimed her palm with accuracy, landing sharp swats to Pipsqueak’s sit spots! Never had Pipsqueak squawked so much!

Swat after swat was administered to the bright red rump. Pipsqueak tried to wriggle her behind out of the way, but Santa held her so securely that she had to remain in place whilst a firm palm delivered a well deserved spanking.

Then Santa paused and rubbed Pipsqueak’s stinging cheeks.

“That was for your mischievousness” she scolded the elf, before picking up the silver birch paddle and circling it over the hot cheeks “This is for your naughtiness. Broccoli soup indeed!”

Santa tap tapped the paddle against Pipsqueak’s right cheek. Then a single stingy swat was administered. Pipsqueak roared out, for that had hurt. However, the paddle was now tap tapping in the same place and again a single swat was delivered before Santa moved on and spanked the left cheek with the exact same precision. The paddle then tapped against her right sit spot and a sharp smack was applied which made the elf squeak out and louder still as the paddle smacked her left sit spot.

“One more” announced Santa and directed the paddle across the centre of Pipsqueak’s bottom. Placing the paddle back down on the table, Santa helped Pipsqueak to stand. The elf’s hands went automatically to her heated rear, but Santa brushed her hands away.

“No rubbing yet” and she tugged Pipsqueak’s panties and leggings back up over her flaming seat. Santa then drew Pipsqueak into a hug. Sitting the elf on her knee and wrapping comforting arms around her. It was then that Pipsqueak knew she had been forgiven.


Santa stood Pipsqueak back up on the floor and pushed her gently in the direction of Stripey Long Legs.

“Go swap places with Stripey Long Legs .” Pipsqueak did as she was bid and settled herself gingerly on the hard wooden stool.

Santa’s blue eyes rested on Stripey Long Legs’ face for a few seconds and then without saying a word, she crooked her finger at the elf. Stripey Long Legs, went bright beet but she too did as she was bid and went to stand in front of Santa.

“Time for your spanking.” Santa’s voice was firm as she took the elf’s hand, tipping her over her knee. Stripey Long Legs unlike Pipsqueak, could touch the floor by resting the palms of her hands and her toes on the polished wood.

Santa raised her tunic and patted the upturned seat “Mischievous elves get spanked” and she patted the green and black striped behind again.

“I’m sorry Santa.” Stripey Long Legs apologised. Santa nodded her head in approval, Stripey Long Legs could keep her leggings up for now.

Raising her palm, she brought it down in the centre of the elf’s bottom with a smart smack. Stripey Long Legs let out a holler! Santa almost laughed out loud, for she was not spanking hard. She adjusted her hold on Stripey Long Legs by wrapping her arm around her waist, keeping her close. Again, she brought her hand back down on the upturned rear, spanking the right cheek and then the left. Stripey Long Legs, yelled some more for this was most unpleasant. Just like Pipsqueak, this was her first ever spanking and she was not enjoying the experience!

Santa peppered the naughty bottom, her hand going from one cheek to the other, intent on warming the target area. Once satisfied, she stopped and rubbed a firm hand over the clothed behind. Her finger then hooked in the waistband of the elf’s leggings, for it was time for them to come down!

Santa heard a small gasp from Stripey Long Legs as the leggings were pulled over her rear and an even louder gasp as she grasped the waistband of the elf’s panties and drew them slowly over her hips, leaving a slightly pink bare bottom on display. She began to pick up the pace of the spanking and her hand snapped across the pert rear raising a darker shade of pink to the upraised cheeks.

Spank after spank after spank rained down. Santa had momentum and went right, left, right, left and then centre. The sound of her palm smacking Stripey Long Legs’ bare bottom echoed around the room.  Each cheek was spanked in turn and then Santa dipped one knee, raised her other for it was time to concentrate on Stripey Long Legs’ sit spots. The elf squealed out as a sharp swat landed on her right sit spot, shortly to be followed by another squeal as her left sit spot was swatted.

Pausing, Santa again rubbed circles over the hot behind, helping to massage the heat and sting away. Picking up the little birch wood paddle she rested it against the red bottom. “This is for the broccoli soup prank.”

Santa deftly popped the paddle against Stripey Long Legs’ right cheek with a smart smack, leaving an oval imprint, she paused and then applied the same treatment to the exact same spot. Stripey Long Legs let out the biggest yelp ever and tried to place her hand over her bottom. Santa however, just grasped her hand in hers, making sure that the flailing arm was not injured by the paddle. The left cheek was given the same attention and then Santa moved on to her sit spots, and once more the paddle popped against each, eliciting a yowl from the elf.

“Last one” and the paddle circled over the smarting cheeks before lifting away and coming back down again with a measured swat. Santa placed the paddle back down on the table, quickly scooted up leggings and panties then scooped Stripey Long Legs up into her arms. The elf burrowed her head in Santa’s shoulder and like Pipsqueak she knew that all was forgiven.

Looking up, Santa saw poor Pipsqueak sitting on her stool, she hadn’t moved an inch. Santa’s heart melted, for after all she loved her elves, however mischievous they might be. She beckoned Pipsqueak over to her and together the three embraced.

As the clock began to chime the hour, both elves stifled yawns. Santa smiled to herself, a spanking always brought on the need for a nap.

“Come” and she led the elves across the room, pushed open a door and motioned for them to enter. Two beds stood side by side, with bright coloured blankets and plumped up pillows. The elves rubbed their eyes, for they were tired.

“Time for bed” announced Santa.

“But Santa…” said Pipsqueak as she tumbled into bed, quickly lying on her tummy.

“Are we still on the naughty list?” finished off Stripey Long Legs as she plopped into bed turning onto her tummy too.

Santa laughed and shook her head. “Your slate is clean” and turning off the light she pulled the door closed.


And so……

Santa strode down the rows of beds in the infirmary with a merry look on her face. Her elves, although still tucked up in bed were recovering and the red splodge was more of a pink blotch. A table had been set up in the middle, laden with festive fare for Bossy Boots had decided Christmas dinner was to be held in the infirmary, for the elves were still on bed rest and not allowed to be up. Reaching the end of the row, Santa turned and looked towards Bossy Boots for something was amiss.

“Where are Pipsqueak and Stripey Long Legs?”

Bossy Boots shook her head, she really had no idea where the troublesome pair could be. Then suddenly as if in answer to Santa’s question they heard whizzes followed by bangs! Bossy Boots almost jumped out of her boots in surprise! Santa however, smiled and crossed to the long window, pulling back the curtains. Silhouetted against the night sky were her two most mischievous elves, Pipsqueak and Stripey Long Legs. Both were running back and forth, lighting fireworks as they went. The elves in their beds squealed with delight as the darkness was painted with all manner of colours. This was a treat indeed.

Everyone watched the firework show and it was a show indeed! Then finally, as the last rocket exploded, showering the night sky with sliver sparkles, Pipsqueak and Stripey Long Legs turned towards Santa and acknowledged her with a bow. Santa accepted their salute with a slight nod of her head, then opening the large French windows she gestured for them to come indoors.

Soon the infirmary was abuzz with noise as elves and Santa took their place at the table. Pipsqueak and Stripey Long Legs took pride of place on either side of Santa and if they were sitting on pluffed up cushions, no one mentioned it. When the last mince pie had been eaten and the final cracker pulled, Santa stood. Then in the voice that her elves so loved to hear, she raised her goblet “Merry Christmas one and all!”

The End

29 Responses to Elf Warming!

  1. Alyx says:

    Jojo, this story was so warm and fuzzy, it brought a smile to my face. 🙂 It made one want to cheer Pipsqueak and Stripey Long Legs on, even as one’s palm was itching. *LOL* It was fun to read about their adventures, and it makes me think the North Pole must be a very interesting place indeed! Thanks so much for sharing with us this holiday season.

  2. Wookie says:

    Great story Jojo. I loved the fireworks at the end…. where there are brats there has to be fireworks!
    So us “newbies” are leading the way huh… way to go Jojo 🤣

  3. Ash says:

    Lovely story, Jojo. 🙂 I really liked their names. And I see you mentioned me too! (Goody Two Shoes). 😛

  4. Peachie says:

    Such a fun story Jojo! Loved it. Thanks for sharing. Sure helped me get into holiday mood. 🙂

  5. stardawn19 says:

    Aw. Such a sweet story. I enjoyed it very much. Good feels and smiles for sure! Thank you for sharing it.

  6. LoganTyler says:

    Jojo, I loved these two and they definitely got me into the Christmas spirit! These two elves reminded me of some brats I know lol. I was actually a little sad when the story ended. I think I’m gonna miss them! Thank you for your wonderful gift. 🙂

    • Jojo says:

      Hey Logan, maybe I did base it on a couple of brats I know lol. Glad you liked reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it 😁

  7. Hupotasso says:

    I love this fun, sweet story. It definitely gets me in the mood for the holidays, and who doesn’t enjoy a pair of mischievous elves with such great names? Thanks for this wonderful gift!

  8. Thanks for the gift, Jojo. What a fun story! The shenanigans of Pipsqueak and Stripey Long Legs gave me a good giggle.

  9. laineytales says:

    What a mischievous pair they are but yet you are kinda drawn to them. Well done JoJo for such a fun, warm tale.

    E xx

  10. Robin says:

    Love your charming story Pipsq…I mean Jojo! LoL! This adventure sure brought the Christmas feeling. I loved it all but especially the hamster running up Santa’s back 😀 and ofcourse the fireworks!!! 😍Thank you so much for sharing this story!

  11. Mil says:

    Thanks so much, Jojo! You write so well! Very cute (and deserving) characters 😀 Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!

  12. Jojo says:

    Thank you soooo much for your comments. I really enjoyed writing the story and it’s been lovely to share it with you. It’s only the second short story that I’ve seriously written before. It’s been quite a challenge to share it with some very seasoned and very good writers out there. So thanks for the opportunity Alyx to post on your blog. 😊

  13. Claire says:

    Love this Jojo! I’m with Alyx, this sweet fun story definately gave me the warm fuzzys!😁 After reading it I couldn’t help thinking about the song ‘The Elf’s Lament’😉

    Thanks for sharing.

  14. Ellie says:

    Loved it Jojo, made me smile sooooo hard! 😀 I think those two little elves remind me of someone I know! 😂 I guess we all have a Pips and a Stripey among our friends! Thank you so much for the awesome, funny, happy, warm, lighthearted gift!!

  15. cj says:

    Jojo I really enjoyed your story. I love the mischief your elves found. Great Santa too!! Thank you so much for sharing.

  16. Anna says:

    Wonderful Jojo! While reading it, I was thinking it could be a children’s story. Seriously, think about a few minor changes to make it palatable for those that don’t believe in spanking children and then publish it. I would buy it for my nieces!

    • Jojo says:

      Do you know what, you’ve made my day! That is something, I might well look into. I’ve actually started writing some stories about two fluffy toys. Maybe I should stop writing spanking stories and become a children’s author lol.

  17. Ellie says:

    Jojo…whenever I read the link to your story I keep reading the title as “Elf WarMing”, instead of warning! lol XD

  18. jaykay says:

    Love your story Jojo. The elves were charming. Hope you write more of their antics for next Christmas. Thanks much.

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